Most of you know that I am pretty open about this "being single"
business. As much as I strive to embrace it and bask in the
opportunities, freedom, and friendships that I have, it can still be
hard! My roommates and I all agree that being single is legit trial. And
not like I'm trying to compare trials or anything or even complain;
it's just that for someone (me) who expected to get married a while ago,
this experience has definitely caught me off guard!
My
dear friend, Charity, wrote a blog post recently that truly encompasses
my current feelings about being single. Again, it's not that I want to
be a bitter person or anything like that but just honestly say: it's not
easy to be alone! There's an ache inside of me that years to take care
of someone, pair off, and deal with the pains of life with a helpmeet
rather than doing it alone. I have had this ache before I was even
marriageable age. To not have your righteous desires met (yet) can cause
an ongoing frustration.
Here's her post here
(with her permission). For all of my blog audience, I think it yields a
lot of reflection and progressing empathy for people in this stage of
life.
I want to end on a positive note because I believe in being
optimistic. I know that this being alone, not lonely business has given
me a cause to truly empathize, love, and serve others. I have felt
myself being pruned until I have had no branches left. The greatest
pruning has been in the last few months. I have felt transformed and
changed by the atonement. I know that my Savior bears my burdens and
loves me for He has ultimately felt the most alone in life. I am
grateful to know that I as I strive to make this stage of life
meaningful, joyful, and learned that I can rely on Him through the bumps
and sporadic bursts of aloneness.
All will be well!
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3 comments:
I read the link that you shared. It was beautifully written and I could feel her raw emotions through her language. I connect with her feelings of being grateful to feel so fully, so deeply(even if the feeling is an sadness) because it yields such a rich mortal experience. I actually worry when I can sense myself putting up a wall to protect myself from feeling these kinds of emotions. I think allowing ourselves to fully feel all the emotions that we're capable of (happiness, sadness, grief, fear, etc.) makes us that much more of a genuine, authentic person.
Loved your post and Charity's thoughts. I love the part about aloneness and being lonely. You have so much to give and the Lord is mindful of you. Loves...
I feel ya! Love you...Thanks for making the effort to go see the kids!
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